Make it somehow all seem worthwhile

Call you up in the middle of the night
Like a firefly without a light
You were there like a slow torch burning
I was a key that could use a little turning

So tired that I couldn't even sleep
So many secrets I couldn't keep
Promised myself I wouldn't weep
One more promise I couldn't keep

It seems no one can help me now
I'm in too deep
There's no way out
This time I have really led myself astray

Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there

Can you help me remember how to smile
Make it somehow all seem worthwhile
How on earth did I get so jaded
Life's mystery seems so faded

I can go where no one else can go
I know what no one else knows
Here I am just drownin' in the rain
With a ticket for a runaway train

Everything is cut and dry
Day and night, earth and sky
Somehow I just don't believe it

Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
Seems like I should be getting somewhere
Somehow I'm neither here nor there

Bought a ticket for a runaway train
Like a madman laughin' at the rain
Little out of touch, little insane
Just easier than dealing with the pain

Runaway train never comin' back
Runaway train tearin' up the track
Runaway train burnin' in my veins
Runaway but it always seems the same

deflated

so after phone calls to 3 different organisations, and being passed through 7 different departments my plans for the future are somewhat shattered.

i really didn't want to be another graduate to leave uni and end up in a low payed low skilled job. i actually wanted my degree to be worth the 3 grand it cost me.

Measures.

The prologue:

I was browsing one of the myspace forums that I am a member of. Through a mixture of curiosity and boredom I started to search and click through some of the other forums that myspace hosts. Stumbled across a certain car related forum, and a 3 page argument between an articulate and amusing poster and a pretty dumb salesman. I had a look at the articulate and amusing poster's profile and ending up spending a good few minutes reading through his blog. One of his post's really struck a cord, which is what this post is based upon.

The post:

Seeing as I started school in the late 1980s I have never been taught anything other than metric measurements, but I seem to have picked up a certain number of imperial measures, meaning that now I use a mixture of the two depending on what it is, or the situation.

For example, I measure temperature in centigrade. I know that I don't really like being outside when it's 5 or below, and that I do quite like being outside when its about 15 or above. 0 is pretty cold, and minus number is very cold and anything over 25 is fairly uncommon and can be quite uncomfortable. Fahrenheit means nothing to me, you could tell me its 25 F or 105 F and I wouldn't know if that was good or bad.

I, and I have an incling that I'm not alone here, measure time in imperial. I remember a watch company, I think it was SWATCH, tried to introduce a metric time/internet time watch a couple of years ago (my 'couple of years' can mean any time between 2 years ago to about 8 years ago) where the day was divided into a daft amount of equal segments. Thus meaning that it would be the same time all over the world, say 106 'beats'. Instead of each country having it's own timezone, there would only be one global timezone, just meaning that 108 beats in one country could be the middle of the day whereas in another country it could be the middle of the night.

Distance is interesting. If I'm in the car then I use miles (and MPH for speed). I know how long a KM is, in that it is 1000m, but I can't relate that distance to anything, just doesn't make sense to me. If I am measuring something then I will either use CM or inches, depends on what it is. My skateboard is measured in inches, the diameter of my skateboard wheels are measured in MM. If I have to buy something to fit a certain space I will often take measurements in both.

Metres don't really mean too much to me because again I can't really relate to them. I know that I am nearly 6 feet tall, so I often use that as a base when trying to scale things. I have no idea how high a ceiling is in M, but I could easily guestimate it in feet.

If I'm cooking something (not often that my cooking involves more than putting something near a heatsource and leaving till it's burnt) I prefer grams. Although I can't relate to how heavy a gram is, nor an ounce for that matter. I hardly ever buy an ounce of anything ;)

If I'm weighing myself (which I do sometimes to see how 'underweight' I am - just goes to show how much of a nanny state we live in now, according to most BMI calculators I am officially classed as underweight/anorexic. I disagree with this as I'm not anorexic, nor underweight imo but because my BMI is well below the 'normal' 18.5 that's what I must be *sigh*)I use stones. Pounds mean nothing to me. At all.

I drink beer in pints, or bottles. I know a bottle is roughly half a pint (just short of) and I know that a pint is about 2 cans. Cans are a good base for me, I know cans, although the 440ml ones were invented just to screw my system up. I also buy bottles in litres.

The measure I use to buy petrol is £. When that number gets to the number that I can afford, then my cars full ;)

I don't mind litres, or ml, but what I do hate is when things are measured as 0.33l for a can of pop...it's not 0.33l it's 330ml. Also what is with using a comma as a decimal point? Decimal points are . not ,

Anyone else use a mixture of measurements?

In other news me and Phill walked down to eurocar (kroozin or whatever the hell it's called now) in town today. Got some shirts. It started thundering and lightening. We went in Gregg's and I had pizza and fair trade orange juice. Got the bus home due to rain and it was stupidly expensive.

Pruvaloo BSc (Hons)

It was my graduation ceremony today. It was really nice seeing all my uni friends again, although it was really sad to think that that was probably the last time that I would see them all in the same place at the same time. I really don't want to loose contact with them, they make me feel like I am part of something, and they produce amazing work which makes me feel like anything is possible because we are willing to work out fingers to the bone for what we love.

In sort I guess you could say that they inspire me.

So.

That's it, after 3 years and some very happy times, and some very sad times (you guys were always there to take me out into Manchester to cheer me up when things were bad, and you were always there smiling with my in the Pint Pot over a game of pool when things weren't so bad and for that I thank you.) and a fair amount of debt, and a whole load of time spent commuting, spent on trains, spent thinking during a traffic jam, spend at night speachless because of the beauty of 3 lanes of white lights heading towards me and 3 lanes of red lights heading away from me, it's all over.

I can now officially write 'BSc (Hons)' after my name, should I wish to. There are some people who didn't stick around, but I did finish my journey. This is for the people who did stick around.

Days in the South

As usual click for larger versions of the photos.

For a couple of days last week I lived in a little room in the South. I went to this place a couple of times



I lived here









I wore my Spitfire tshirt that day



This is what it looked like when I looked out of my window at night

Being offered a job

Got some photos and stuff to write up about my interview trip, but that stuff can wait for now.

I've just had a phone call from *company* saying that they would like to offer me the job :D

Looks like I passed my assessments and I didn't mess up the interview too much. However, I'm not packing my bags and moving down south just yet, as there are a couple of issues with the contract that we need to sort out before I would be able to accept the job.

Steps in the right direction though kidder.

Interview :D

GET IN :D!!!

Last night at 7.30 I emailed my CV to *very large games company*, I guess they must of liked what they read because this afternoon someone from *very large games company* rang me to invite me down to an assessment and interview.

According to some mapping websites, its over 200 miles between where I live, and where my interview is, so I'm going to be driving down south and staying over a couple of days in a hotel. Might even have time to pop into London for a bit of a look round seeing as I will be very close-by, which I think would be pretty cool.

I'll be setting off sometime on Monday, my interview and assessment is scheduled to start on Tuesday at 6pm. At the moment I'm trying to find out if I know anyone who lives down that way. I'd much rather go exploring and have a couple of friendly beers than spend the entire time in a hotel room, but we shall see.

WOOOO :D

pt 2

My mouse broke last night :( no more lovely optical scroll wheel action for me, I'm having to use this wireless 3 button jobby, and it's making my hand hurt. I'm not too keen on it.

Also, why is it that people (companies) like to kick you when you're down? On reflection I think maybe I would like to not hear anything back rather than 'You're not good enough'. It's like, 'Hey, low self esteem guy, lets kick him in the f***ing nuts while he's down'. Buggers.

Right, today's biscuit is Cadbury's Animals. As the name suggests these are/were animal shaped biscuits, chocolate one side, and err, biscuit on the other. I remember being at the old house, my grandad was baby sitting me, and I was sitting in front of the fire with a plate of these watching my Transformers videos. Life was pretty good then.

Pondering biscuits

It suddenly occurred to me last night that if someone asked me what my favourite biscuit was, I wouldn't be able to give them an answer.

(what else is there to think about at 2am when its too hot to sleep and i'm alone?)

That in turn made me think about "Fish 'n' Chips". God I loved those things. They were kinda like savoury snack biscuits with a really really nice flavour. (fish and chip flavour surprise surprise) I think reading about them, they don't sound too great, but man they WERE SOOOOO NICE. I used to go to Malcolm's and buy 2 or 3 packs at a time. Makes my mouth water just thinking about them.

And before you think I'm tripping, I assure you these were a proper product. I've searched high and low, and I've only been able to find this picture of them, but at least it proves that they did exist :)



I haven't seen or tasted these things for at least 10 years, and apparently they have gone out of production...but I want some :'(

It all started with a teapot

Maxforums have organised one of their competitions, so I thought it'd be fun to enter. This is the image I made, it's just for the qualifying round, still enjoyed making it though. The theme for this round was: "It all started with a teapot".

My image is intended to pay homage to the Utah Teapot in it's first incarnation. As usual click for the proper sized version.

Emma

We were sitting in a bar after watching Steve's band play when a woman came over and asked if she could sit next to me. I said she could. She introduced herself, and told me all about her kids and how she had recently split up with her partner of 10 years. I guess we chatted for about an hour, maybe a bit less - I didn't pay attention to the time. She told me about going to Donnington to see Metallica, I told her about going to see Iron Maiden at Leeds.

She was saying how scary it was to be on her own again, and how it had taken a lot of confidence just to come into this bar. My longest relationship has been nowhere near 10 years, but I could kinda relate to what she was saying. I mean, you (or I) get so attached to someone, and so used to there always being someone there to say 'Well Done!!' in the happy times, or 'Hey, everything will be OK' in the bad times, and then when they're gone and the only person you have is you again it's scary.

I had to go because we were all getting a taxi back together. Just before I left though she said 'I think you're lovely, and you're gonna meet a lovely girl'. I shook my head and said 'I don't think so'. Then 'I tend to be pessimistic not optimistic'. She said 'I used to be like that'.