this is awesome

http://www.last.fm/music/Yndi+Halda/_/Dash+And+Blast

it really really is

using new eyes to see new sights

i think its a cliche when someone talks about a defining moment, but it was definitely something like that. it was like waking up, or stepping out into the rain. a veil being lifted or approaching it from a new perspective, using new eyes to see new sights. oohh cliches are fun, aren't they?

having said that, i don't think there was one cause. i think it was the combination of lots of seemingly unrelated things which all combined at just the right time, to form a prominent moment.

is there such a thing as prominence though? maybe it's just something we invented in order to identify a moment. some way of marking one particular unremarkable moment, of making it stand out from all those other unremarkable moments that we experience.

things tend to only be big deals if you let them be big deals. otherwise they can slip past quite peacefully without you even noticing. maybe prominence is a way of making a big deal out of something that for one reason or another we don't want to slip past unmarked.

or maybe prominence is one of those things which is only accessible in the future. the light at the end of the tunnel almost. a reward for living through something, for experiencing whatever it is we experience, and then patting us on the back and giving us the chance to mark this moment forever. i mean, how often do we actually realise the importance of something at the time? not too often i'll bet.

we don't realise that we will never see that person again. or that friendships will lose touch, or that the handshake will be the last before you turn and stroll away. and i guess prominence allows us to throw together a bunch of stuff and form some kind of relationship between events, some kind of linear connection which can help to explain things which are anything but linear.

like hindsight, perhaps prominence is something we can only ever get after it has already happened. and that is what makes it so beautiful. hindsight really highlights the bittersweet nature of free will - or what we perceive to be free will anyways. makes you realise how different things may have been if only the string of events which lead to the present had been different, or occured in a different order.

And the Ripped Ones say goodbye
While the others meet,
Attached somewhere
At least they're shared

And the Ripped Ones never collide,
While the others
While the others

da da da da da da......da da da da da da...
da da da dunna da da da
da da da dunna da da da

da da da da da da......da da da da da da...
da da da dunna da da da
da da da dunna da da da

Four
(And the Ripped Ones say goodbye) Nine
Five
(While the others meet) Three
(attached somewhere) One
(At least they're shared)

Four
(And the Ripped Ones never collide) Nine
Five
(While the others) Three
(While the others) One
(While the others)

da da da da da da......da da da da da da...
da da da dunna da da da
da da da dunna da da da

da da da da da da......da da da da da da...
da da da dunna da da da
da da da dunna da da da

Four, nine, five, three, one
Four, nine, five, three, one
Four, nine, five, three, one

edit: nevermind, fuck that

not been around in time

so then, not been around in time. its either good or bad, depending on how you look at it. i look at it as a good thing.

im excited about next month, and looking forward to july. and august.

the past week or however many has been kinda blurred. feels so good to get out there again.

its not that i dont wanna be around, its just im not sure what to say, and i know that sucks and im sorry. i hope you say its ok. you just seem to be able to deal with anything by yourself. im not really sure how you manage that. but i admire it.

im not here for a long time. im here for a good time.

peace and love, yeah?