Friday, March 20, 2009

i dream about being chased or hunted quite a lot. i had a dilemma not long since, it was night and i was being chased by a group who wanted to kill me. i was running home. they were pretty close behind me, and i dropped my key. time stopped and i had to make a decision. either i carry on running and leave my key, but then i have no way of escaping to safety, plus the group will pick up the key and know where i live. but if i turn and go back to pick up the key then the group will surely catch me. i didnt know what to do, and spent a long time trying to weigh up the pros and cons of each scenario. well actually just the cons, there were no pros, either i was going to be chased forever with no hope of getting to a safe place, or i was going to get a good kicking. neither one of those things seems like a good choice. i think i went back to get the key. the group caught me. after a while i guess i was too hurt to feel anything any more. it felt like i was melting into the path as i closed my eyes.

the other night i dreamt about spiders - which is strange because i am shit scared of them. i dont even like writing the word so im going to shorted it to 'sp'. ive always been scared of them for as long as i can remember. all but the very smallest bring me out in goose bumps and make me feel sick to my stomach, so it wasn't exactly a fun dream. first of all i had to build a sp, not like a mechanical one, but a real living one. it was hung in a large garage, and id slowly assemble the parts. then i walk through the door and its sitting on a sofa watching tv. this huge sp, which towered above me.

in last nights dream we were sitting on some swings in a bar. we were just talking, i was joking around and you were laughing lots. you said i was funny. i said i knew. you asked why i was making you laugh. i said i wanted you to be happy. you asked why i was still bothered, why i still cared. i avoided answering by saying that i wanted everyone to be happy. my friend who i havent seen for months came into the place, he told me he was going downstairs to hit up the bar. it sounded like a good idea. i let him go off on his own, and we stayed there sitting on the swings.

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